Finding Vienna

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Billy Joel is one of my favorite artists, and I can so easily get lost in his songs for hours. Some of them are just great to listen to, but others really make me think. Take, for example, the song Vienna:

Slow down, you crazy child
You’re so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you’re so smart, then tell me
Why are you still so afraid?

Where’s the fire, what’s the hurry about?
You’d better cool it off before you burn it out
You’ve got so much to do and
Only so many hours in a day

So often I run around like a maniac trying to get my life in order; I try and pursue ‘Vienna’. I chase after contentment and a life of pure happiness, with no sorrow. But it isn’t in the times of happiness that I grow; it’s the hard times where I am on my knees and crying out to God for release that I grow. So why do I chase after times of tranquility? They aren’t the times that I move forward in. Admittedly, I do need times of rest, and the contented times do have their purpose. But I always say that I want to grow, get to know God more, learn what it means to fully trust him, but to get all of those things I need to go through hard times.

If I were to take a step back and gain a bit of perspective I would realize that what makes ‘Vienna’ so wonderful is the process of getting there. ‘Vienna’ to me is contentment; a settled heart with deeply felt joy. ‘Vienna’ is a resounding shout of joy that is laced with relief after coming through something hard. If ‘Vienna’ were to be handed to me on a gold platter I would value it much less than I would have if I had gone through hell to get there.

So why do I do it? Why do I run from the hard situations, and why do I shy away from challenges? Is the opposite of running away embracing challenges? Running at them head on? Let’s say that it is true- that I should embrace trials- won’t I get exhausted physically and emotionally; not to mention spiritually? Where is the happy medium?

Wow, there I go again. Too many questions. Maybe I should just stop right now before I try and figure too many things out.I think I’ll just sit back, turn my phone off, watch the sunset, and soak in the quietness for a little while.

In fact, Vienna waits for me.

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