Yay! My first post! Who would have ever thought that I would start a blog? And yet here I am. I wonder who will read this (if anybody)? I will probably just post things that are on my mind or happening in my life to begin with. We will see what happens from there. So to start, I’ll write down what is going on in my brain; I will try and sort it out as best as I can, but most times I can’t even make sense of what goes on up there, but here it goes!
Thought One: Motivation? Where does it come from, and why isn’t it permanent? I swear that it’s a drug of some sort; but a positive one that helps people. You can never go wrong with motivation. Sadly, unlike the majority of drugs, it can’t be bought (and what a sad thing that is… if anyone figures out a way to bottle up motivation – let me know!!). But for some reason motivation is like time: people can never seem to get enough of it, and it is very elusive! I envy the people who motivation comes easily to.
Thought Two: What is the meaning of life? It’s cliche, but I actually want to know. Have you ever had one of those thoughts that seems to resonate in your brain for quite a while? This is definitely one of those thoughts. When I wake up, this thought is there; while I fall asleep, my brain is pelted with similar thoughts. I have to wonder what God is trying to tell me, or what it is that he wants me to figure out. After a good solid month of this I am almost at my wits’ end. I wonder if I am the only one out there wondering this, or if others have thoughts along these lines.
Hawk Nelson sums up how I feel fairly well:
Gonna find a new beginning
Lately tired of the life I’m livin
Find a way to make a change
In the lives of all of us who need
To find the meaning of life
Thought Three: Is it possible to feel such contentment? Even with all of the above things running around in my head I can help but feel a peace as I go about my daily tasks. I feel a little bit of a loss for words for how to describe the thoughts and emotions inside me; peace, settled, satisfied, fulfilled. I sing with a joy for my Father above that I have never known before, and there is no hindrance in my way. He is my light, and what gets me though my hard days. Silent prayers of thankfulness and worship float through my head. My subconscious being praises Him, and I never want this feeling to stop. Will He ever stop astounding me? I surely hope not.