Is that what I am? An enemy of God? I must ask myself what went wrong when I choose the ways of the world over my maker. In the Book of James it says: “You should know that loving the world is the same as hating God. Anyone who wants to be a friend of the world becomes God’s enemy.” As scary as it is to admit it, I must then ‘hate’ the Lord. When I realized this, my first thought was “alright, I guess this means that to hate the world is to love God,” but once again, I realized that I was in the wrong; although it took a lot of frustration, prayer and time for me to understand what the problem was.
During the process of hating the world I found myself becoming miserable. I was disgusted with society, the media, North American lifestyle, and the life entirely; but as I moved along with this resolution to hate the world things got worse and worse. I stopped talking with God; worship songs no longer held meaning, hope was lost, and I found myself in a place where things were going from bad to worse. The word “meaningless” took on a whole new form in my life; it played a role that it had never played for me before. Only by the help a friend (and of course the grace of God) was I able to get off of my knees, and back onto my feet with a little bit of love as my solid ground.
Where had love gone?
I need love.
I need the love of God.
Love begins coming back into my life; with it comes contentment once again. Contentment that I wrote about a few posts before this one. I find that little things no longer shake my world, and I find myself turning to God once again with my troubles. I ask myself the question: Which friendship am I choosing? One with god? Or one with the world? To have both is not possible.